WHEN WALL MET DALAL FOR A HALAL BIRYANI

Dalal steet is all set to welcome Wall street with a biryani of FDI in every sector. I'm amazed at our government's eagerness to attract foreign investors. Our desi ones are grappling with power cuts, labour issues and bribes. The neighbourhood seth Mangilal is going to be replaced with Stepahnie and Mark from Walmart. Every Tarun, David and Hussein knows what FDI means. Soon, his pension is going to fund the Americans War on Terror, whatever that means.
FDI in retail, pension, banking, education and soon, graves will be part of our daily lives. Big Brother will be watching the way you spend and the way you go to toilet. It will no longer be Indian style. Your money has to be flushed out of your stinking pockets, whether you are rich or not. FYI, your toilets will be imported for you, and given subsidies by the government, whether you have access to water or not.
Is FDI all bad news? Nope. It generates more jobs, and opens our markets to competition. Hey, you as the consumer get options to choose from. But these are not from our land. Their bottom line doesn't say "Athithi Devo Bhava". Laughing all the way to the banks, RBI included, is their motto. Globalization is out, FDI is in.

It would make sense to give our entrepreneurs a chance to showcase their talent, creativity and generate jobs. More wealth by an Indian in India would ensure a part of the profits are circulated back to the society, be it the bakery, the tin-made cigarette shop, the one-stand-one-basket paani puri bhaiyya and Ram Singh at security.
I do not understand the entire FDI rigmarole, and neither does Kamalamma, our house maid. But she knows that she has to shell out more money for her beetle leaf, 'cause the land got taken up for SEZ. Her grandson wants a McVeggie, and not kobrimithai and kodbele (Karnataka's patented dishes). And her granddaughter has to be sent to the "international school", where a pervert headmaster might have cast his dirty eyes on her.
We are remarkably resilient and can very well sustain ourselves. FDI is important, but not a necessity. Let us not go back to the pre-Independence era. Between Grey's Anatomy and Homeland (FDI shows?), i don't have time nor patience to fight another battle for my freedom.